Bailing your adult child out of jail can be a challenging process, both emotionally and financially. It’s why so many parents end up making mistakes.

The purpose of this article is to discuss these mistakes so that you can have a better experience when dealing with the bail system.

Keep reading to learn more about the 10 mistakes parents make when bailing out their child from jail.

1. Panicking While You Try To Bail Out Your Child

When your child goes to jail, panic can be a big issue, and you might make rash decisions that you later regret.

Most parents don’t want to see their child in jail, so this reaction is understandable!

Staying Calm and Contacting Help: 

We understand 100% how difficult it can be to stay calm when your child is in jail.

However, the best solution is to stay calm and contact a professional bail bondsman who can get your child out of jail as soon as possible.

Here are some things to remember when bailing out your child:

  • Panic doesn’t help. It only makes things worse.
  • Call a professional bail bond agent ASAP and talk through your situation.
  • Focus on the steps you are given to help your child rather than the worst-case scenario.
  • Remember that bail is just part of the process. You can get it solved.

Example of Why Staying Calm When Bailing Out Your Child Is So Important: 

Here’s a situation common to the bail bond industry. Let’s say you’re a single mom who has a 20-year-old son (or daughter) who’s been struggling with addiction, and they get arrested.

Your son’s not even 21 yet and is just a kid in many ways.

You get a call from the police station in the middle of the night, find out what’s happened, and start panicking.

The next thing you know, you’re neck-deep in the bail process without understanding it. Perhaps you call a less-than-fair bail bond company and sign a bad bail bond contract.

Or even worse, you find a way to scrape together enough cash to cover the full bail amount, only to end up losing it because your child later violates the terms of their release.

The Bottom Line: These two responses are classic illustrations of what NOT to do, yet people do things like this on a regular basis. Staying calm and thinking things through helps you avoid these types of reactions.

2. Paying The Full Bail Amount Instead of Getting A Bail Bond

As a parent with a child in jail, your likely instinct is to get them out as soon as possible. We agree with this instinct. However, paying the full bail amount in cash is usually NOT the fastest solution.

Cash Bail Is Expensive:

Cash bail amounts are usually quite high. In fact, based on our experience in the industry, we’d guess the national average is about $10,000. This is something your everyday person simply can’t afford.

Getting $10,000, whether through community support or a loan, can take time. For this reason, using a bail bond is faster and safer in most cases.

Reasons Why It’s Better To Get A Bail Bond: 

  • It’s usually faster than trying to pay the total bail amount.
  • You only pay a fraction of the total bail amount.
  • Your bail bondsman guides you through the process.
  • You can usually get a payment plan for your bail bond premium. 

Note: If you’ve got a child in jail, it’s not a good idea to pull out a loan. There are many better alternatives. For example, some bail bond companies, including All n One Bail Bonds, offer payment plans with low down payments.

3. Hiring The First Available Bail Bondsman Without Exploring Options

When you need to bail your child out of jail, rushing to post bond can only end badly.

After all, there are shady bail bondsmen who are more than happy to take advantage of your situation and have you sign a bad bail bond contract.

The Solution? Look at Google Reviews: 

We suggest taking a few minutes to do a quick Google search and finding a bail bond agency with good reviews from customers in a similar situation to yours.

Simple as that.

We know you can’t spend hours and hours finding the exact right bail bond company during an emergency. But a quick check on Google can save you from a lot of heartache down the road.

The Bail Bond Company’s Availability: 

Another issue is availability. Your bail bond company must be available 24/7 because emergencies don’t always happen during business hours.

If the bail bond company doesn’t offer 24/7 support, there’s no point in choosing their service when other bail bond companies are more than happy to offer such support.

The Quality of Communication:

Additionally, when you call a bail bond company, do they treat you with respect? If the answer is no, even if they have good reviews on Google and provide 24/7 support, seek service elsewhere.

Ultimately, if they don’t respect you, they won’t treat you right, and that’s the LAST thing you want when signing a bail bond contract.

Here’s how a bail bond company should communicate:

  • Listen patiently and understand your situation.
  • Address all your concerns and answer questions thoroughly.
  • Explain the bail process clearly, using plain language.
  • Be transparent about the cost.
  • Offer a personalized solution that fits your unique needs.
  • Provide 24/7 support and guidance throughout the process.
  • Communicate with empathy, professionalism, and a genuine desire to help.

4. Agreeing to Unfavorable Bail Bond Terms and Conditions

When you’re trying to get your child out of jail, it’s easy to get pressured into signing the first bail bond agreement that comes your way. But again, not all bail bond companies offer good terms and conditions.

In this situation, it’s so important to take a step back and really understand what you’re getting into. For instance, what are the terms of your payment plan?

Red Flags: 

To avoid an unfavorable bail bond contract, here are red flags to watch out for:

  • Vague contract language or open-ended wording.
  • Unrealistic payment plans that don’t align with your financial situation.
  • Aggressive or intimidating tactics to get you to agree to the terms.
  • Pressure to sign an agreement before you’ve fully read and understood it.

Importance of Budgeting:

For most people, budgeting is an essential part of getting a bail bond.

While not nearly as expensive as paying the full bail amount, bail bonds are still expensive, and families often need to set up a payment plan to cover the amount.

This amount also has to be considered against one’s legal fees, which means your bail bond terms can’t interfere with your overall budget. Rather, they need to accommodate your budget.

5. Communicating Poorly with Your Child, Bail Bondsman, and Attorney

When your child gets arrested, you need to communicate with multiple people to get the issue solved. These include your child, the bail bond agent, and your child’s attorney.

With all three parties vying for your attention, it can be easy to miss details. However, there are some things you can do to stay on track.

Get Contact Information:

Right away, it’s important to get everyone’s contact information and set some ground rules for response times and availability. That way, there will be no confusion or missed messages.

If multiple family members are involved, it’s a good idea to pick one person to be the main point of contact for the bail bond agent and attorney. It’s certainly possible to have multiple points of contact, but it does require extra coordination.

Ask Questions and Seek Clarifications:

If there’s something you don’t understand, whether it’s about the bail process, court dates, or legal jargon, don’t be afraid to ask questions. It’s better to get clarifications than to make assumptions.

Provide and Ask For Regular Updates:

During the bail process, it’s a good idea to check in periodically—to both provide and ask for updates. If something happens, don’t wait. Keep your bail bond agent and attorney informed.

6. Not Setting Firm Expectations with Your Child When Bailing Them Out

Once your child is bailed out of jail, the next step is to set expectations, such as obeying the court. Now, sometimes parents want to set expectations, but they don’t fully understand what the court is asking.

Here’s a list of requirements courts usually have:

  • Showing up to all court dates.
  • Staying out of trouble and avoiding new criminal charges.
  • Following travel restrictions or curfews.
  • Not having weapons.
  • Not using alcohol/drugs.
  • Keeping a job and/or staying in school.
  • Steering clear of alleged victims and witnesses.
  • Going to counseling or treatment programs or doing community service.

Maintaining Expectations Once Your Child Is Out of Jail: 

Fortunately, if you’re having trouble setting expectations, your bail bond agent can help reinforce to your child how important it is that they comply with the court’s orders.

Your bail bond agent should check in with your child regularly and remind them, if necessary, of the consequences of violating their bail conditions.

Moreover, your bail bond agent will have the experience to pick up on red flags and point them out to you.

7. Not Creating A Comprehensive Post-Release Plan

Question: Do you have a plan once you’ve bailed your adult child out of jail?

If the answer is “no,” then we suggest creating a post-release plan.

Aspects of A Comprehensive Post-Release Plan:

Supervision and Monitoring: This includes regular check-ins and monitoring of social media accounts and online activities.

Support Network: This includes finding trusted friends, mentors, or professionals your child can speak with.

Addressing Underlying Issues: Substance abuse and behavioral issues are heavily correlated with arrests. Your post-release plan will need to account for this.

Community Involvement: Church communities, social support groups, and rehabilitation programs are worth considering.

Ongoing Evaluation and Adjustment: We understand that some defendants may be difficult to work with. For this reason, your post-release plan may need to be adjusted over time to keep it effective.

8. Overlooking the Impact on Your Child’s Siblings

Unfortunately, arrests can have an impact not just on defendants but their siblings as well.

This is tough because, when one child is in jail, parents often go into “emergency” mode and don’t necessarily prioritize well.

What we can do in this situation is help you put the emergency behind you as quickly as possible! From there, you can prioritize your entire family and get everyone back to baseline.

9. Not Protecting Your Well-Being While Bailing Your Child Out of Jail

Over the years, we’ve provided bail bonds to many parents, and we understand that sometimes parents can feel overwhelming guilt when their child is in jail.

The Bad News: This can lead parents to neglect their mental, emotional, and even physical health!

The Good News: Your bail bondsman’s job is to help you throughout the bail process so that you can lower your stress and get the issue behind you.

At All n One Bail Bonds, we do our very best to prioritize your well-being by answering all your calls and going out of our way to help you and your child.

Whether you choose us or another bail bond company, find a company that will answer your questions and get the job done as fast as possible.

Self-Care Is Easier Once The Bail Process Is Over:

Then, once your child is back home safe, it’ll be a lot easier to focus on self-care, as well as recharge and prepare for the defense. It’s much easier to work with an attorney from your home than in jail.

10. Waiting Too Long To Bail Your Child Out

This last mistake is not as common, and it’s a bit of a paradox because parents usually want to get their children out of jail right away.

However, it is possible to encounter delays (including financial ones) that make it hard to bail your child out in a timely manner.

The consequences of waiting too long can be catastrophic. So, if you run into an issue that is keeping you from bailing out your child, call us immediately. We’ll do our best to help!

FAQs: Mistakes When Bailing An Adult Child From Jail

Read this section for frequently asked questions about mistakes parents make when bailing out their adult child.

Is feeling guilty a mistake when my child needs to be bailed out?


When it comes to your child, it is very personal and a difficult issue to deal with. The key is to find support and get the bail process behind you as quickly as possible.

What are some misconceptions about bail that can lead to mistakes?

Bail Bonds Are Only For The Wealthy: One common misconception is that bail bonds are only available to people with money. In fact, the opposite is true. Bail bonds help defendants who can’t afford bail to get out of jail.

Bail Bonds Are The Same As Bail: Another misconception is that bail bonds and bail are the same thing when, in fact, they are different. Bail is the amount set by the court, and bail bonds are a way to pay that amount.

Bail Bonds Are Only For Those Who Pay In Cash: Another misconception is that bail bonds can only be paid in cash. In reality, bail bond companies often accept credit cards and other financial arrangements.

Bail Bonds Are Only Necessary For Serious Crimes: Bail bonds have broader applications than some people think. They can be used for non-violent offenses and misdemeanors, as well as for serious crimes.

Where can parents learn about bail in advance to prevent mistakes?

There are many resources online that teach about bail. Of course, we recommend checking out our Blog, but it’s not the only resource available. For example, YouTube has many videos on the subject.

Keep in mind there is a lot of information out there about bail. To avoid getting stuck in the weeds, the main areas you want to focus on include:

  • Researching reputable bail bond companies.
  • Learning about bail bond premiums and payment options.
  • Learning how bail bond contracts work.
  • Familiarizing yourself with bail release conditions.

What logistical mistakes can parents make when arranging bail from a distance?

Underestimating Travel Costs: Parents may not account for expenses like last-minute flights, rental cars, gas, lodging, and meals away from home. These costs can add up quickly.

Not Understanding Local Bail Processes: Bail procedures vary by jurisdiction. For this reason, parents may struggle to understand the bail process, including what paperwork is required.

Failing to Plan for Time Differences: If parents are in a different time zone, they may misjudge when bail can be posted or when their child will be released.

How can parents avoid mistakes when communicating with law enforcement during the bail process?

It’s often best to let your bail bond agent and attorney do the talking.

Your bail bond agent will:

  • Communicate with the court on your behalf.
  • Provide updates on your child’s case and bail status.
  • Address questions or concerns from the court.

If you must speak with law enforcement, say as little as reasonably possible, and of course, remain calm and respectful.

How can parents avoid mistakes when finding stable housing post-release?

To avoid post-bail housing mistakes, consider these steps:

  • Plan ahead and understand your child’s bail conditions.
  • Consult your attorney for advice on suitable housing.
  • Research housing options that comply with bail requirements.
  • Ensure the housing is stable and supports your child’s reentry.

IMPORTANT: When your child is released on bail, they won’t be able to stay in your house if a felon lives there. If that’s your situation, talk to your attorney about the best options.

You might need to look into getting an apartment or some other living arrangement. Each situation is unique.

How can parents prevent mistakes that lead to their child re-offending after bail?

There’s no perfect solution, but you can anticipate problems by knowing your situation.

Does your child, for instance, have a history of breaking the law? Are they inclined to rebel when you tell them something?

Every situation is different, so there are many mistakes you could potentially make. To avoid issues, as a general rule, you should work closely with an experienced bail bond agent and an attorney.

Professionals who’ve been in this business for some years will recognize bad patterns and warning signs and can provide guidance.

What are the long-term effects on a family after making mistakes in the bail process?

Every family reacts differently, and the effects also depend on how serious the mistake is.

A mistake can be anything from choosing a somewhat rude bail bond company to not posting bail in time, which results, God forbid, in your child getting hurt in jail.

Usually, the mistakes are financial in nature and can lead to incredible financial suffering for families. For example, if your child skips bail, you can lose your bail bond, and this is a major issue.

Contact All N One Bonding and Insurance, Inc.

To avoid mistakes when bailing out your child, call an experienced bail bondsman. We’ll help you navigate the bail process, avoid costly errors, and get your child out of jail ASAP.

Our job is to help families through the bail process without unnecessary stress or complications. Visit our Contact page or call us for more information. We’re here to help!

Note: The information about the bail process is based on our professional experience. For emotional and psychological guidance, please refer to a qualified mental health professional.